Tag Archives: coercive control

book reviews, novel

Heart-Wrenching Story of Family Betrayal

2 Comments

I think this was a recommendation by Sally Cronin. Thanks, Sally. An amazing book. I finished it a couple of days ago, but it’s still resonating.

I think I’ve just found my new favourite author.

OVERVIEW 

A heart wrenching story told with sympathy and understanding. Set in the 1960s, some of the treatment of the children seems harsh and wrong to us now, but in those days, people thought they were doing the right thing.

STORY

Charlie and Chloe are twins. When we first meet them they are eight years old and their mother died three years previously. They are living happily with their father, Graham, although they miss their mother, of course. 

Then one day Graham brings home a woman whom he says he is going to marry. She is the nurse who cared for their mother in her final days.

But she isn’t the kind, understanding woman that she makes everyone believe. 

Charlie sees through her right from the start, and their world gradually turns upside down.

The book takes us through many years as the children become adults.

I don’t want to say more as anything else would be a spoiler.

BLURB

A gripping ‘cuckoo in the nest’ domestic thriller

After the death of their mum, twins Chloe and Charlie are shocked when their dad introduces Lynne as their ‘new mummy’. Lynne, a district nurse, is trusted in the community, but the twins can see her kind smile doesn’t meet her eyes. In the months that follow they suffer the torment Lynne brings to their house as she stops at nothing in her need to be in control.

Betrayed, separated and alone, the twins struggle to build new lives as adults, but will they find happiness or repeat past mistakes? Will they discover Lynne’s secret plans for their father? Will they find each other in time?

The Stranger in My House is a gripping ‘cuckoo in the nest’ domestic thriller, exploring how coercive control can tear a family apart. Set in Yorkshire and Cardiff, from the 60s to the winter of discontent, The Stranger in My House dramatises both the cruelty and the love families hide behind closed doors.

CHARACTERS

The people in this story are well-rounded. No one is perfect.

Charlie is a perceptive little boy. But he lets his resentment eat away at him as he grows up. Not surprisingly, really, given what he has to go through. He is also stubborn in refusing to try to get on with Lynne, his new stepmother.

Chloe is more malleable. She wants to get on with Lynne, and tries to persuade Charlie he’s wrong about her.

Graham is a lovely father; kind and supportive until he becomes more and more under Lynne’s influence. He believes her over his children.

Lynne is shown as a manipulative woman who is willing to wait for years for what she wants. She says she has been in an abusive relationship, but managed to escape.

Lynne has two children of her own, Evie and Saul, both older than Charlie and Chloe.

Evie is lovely, and knows exactly what her mother is like and she helps the twins whenever she can, even if only lending an ear.

Saul, on the other hand, is a bully. He bullies Charlie, but if Charlie says anything, Lynne takes Saul’s side and convinces Graham that Charlie is making it up.

WRITING.

Excellent writing. I felt sympathy for the children and got angry with the adults, just as I would in real life.

The characters are believable written in a sympathetic way, except, of course, Lynne and Saul, whom I was anxious to see get their just deserts.

There were no grammatical errors or typos.

I would fully recommend this book. I couldn’t put it down.

I give it 5*

My ranking of books. In order to get a particular number of stars, it is not necessary to meet all the criteria. This is a guide only.

5* Exceptional. Wonderful story. Setting well drawn, and characters believable–not perfect, but with flaws. Will keep you up all night. No typos or grammatical errors.

4* A thoroughly enjoyable read. Great and original story. Believable setting and characters. Very few grammatical errors or typos.

3* I enjoyed it. Good story. Characters need some development. Some typos or grammatical errors.

2* Not for me. Story not very strong. Unbelievable and flat characters. Setting not clearly defined. Many typos or grammatical errors.

1* I hated it. Story almost non-existent. Setting poor. Possibly couldn’t finish it.

Have you read anything by Judith Barrow? I definitely intend to read more of her books.

Uncategorized

Inclusive Language

Leave a comment

winter-1142029_1280

I heard a programme on the radio yesterday. It was about domestic abuse. Specifically, coercive control. It got me thinking.

Why do men (it’s usually men, although not exclusively, I admit) think they have the right to control their partners or spouses?

Well, I think that it’s because these people consider themselves to be superior and ‘know what’s right’, as well, of course, wanting power over someone. But you can only get power over someone whom you think is inferior to you.

How has this come about? And how can we change attitudes?

This is not an easy thing, but there is one thing that, I think, adds to the problem, and that is exclusive language.

When I was growing up, the common term for our species that was in use was ‘Man’ (With a capital letter to distinguish it from ‘man’, the male of the species.) Nowadays, I often see ‘man’ as referring to the species as a whole. No capital letter to distinguish it from ‘Man’.

If we consider the animal kingdom, often we refer to a species by a name that is the name of one gender or the other. Cow, Goose, Hen, duck, dog etc. We say to our children ‘Let’s go and feed the ducks.’ Or ‘Look at those cows in that field.’
We call these creatures by the name of the gender that is most useful to us. Hens lay eggs. Cockerels don’t. Cows give us milk from which we make butter, and cheese. Bulls don’t. Ducks and geese lay eggs. Drakes and ganders don’t, and when I was growing up, a dog (male) was the preferred gender to have. And ‘bitch’ is a derogatory term, anyway, as are so many female names. (witch and cow, for example.) And if you want to insult a man, you can call him a bit of a ‘girl’ or ‘woman’.

In the north of England, a term of endearment is ‘duck’, but I think it has a certain condescention about it. Probably that’s just me, though

Male names are often, or were in the past, used as praise. A very long time ago, the term ‘a gay dog’ meant that the man was a womanizer. But that was not considered too bad, really. In fact it was often said with some hint of approval. Yet if a woman did the same type of things, she was a ‘slag’.

The male names for animals applied to men do not have the same connotation. A stag party is a group of young men out to have a good time before a wedding. Stags are imposing beasts, strong and beautiful. Now think about the female version—hen party—. Hens are silly, fluttering and noisy clucking creatures. If you want to say someone is unpleasant, you can call them a bitch, or a cow. Even a mare is occasionally used. All names for the female animal.

Now what about the males. I’ve already talked about ‘dog’, but ‘bull’ isn’t used derogatorily. It usually implies the man is strong, and stallion that he’s good in bed, to be polite.

Now to language, which is what this post is all about. Here are some alternatives you can use in your writing (or even in your speech).

winter-1142029_1280
 Man: Human, People, Humanity.
 Man-made: Artificial, Synthetic. (Not only men make goods, you know.)